When We Worry Too Much

I read somewhere not long ago that there are more people in our current culture walking around with low-grade depression and anxiety than at any other time in U.S. History.  

That's an astounding claim, but based on my own experience, I tend to believe it.  

There's a lot of uncertainty in our world, and when you combine that with the amount of information we have access to about all of the things that are not going well, it makes sense that more of us worry than our forbears.  

The other day, I ran across this quote from the comic strip "Peanuts" that both made me laugh but also made me think: 

“Sometimes you lie in bed at night and you don’t have a single thing to worry about. That always worries me!” - Charlie Brown

I have to be honest; that sums up how I felt for a long time.  

Over a year ago, I was struggling with depression and anxiety, so much so that I was having trouble doing even the most straightforward task without overthinking it, fretting over it, and then worrying about whether it was good enough after I did it. 

This would often send me into a spiral into darkness where all I wanted to do was sleep, check out, or otherwise shut out the world and not have to think. 

My therapist had recommended I begin taking anti-depressants, which I had resisted for some time because I was afraid it would make me numb to my feelings, which I didn't want. 

But I finally relented and got a prescription.  I had no idea how much it would change my life.  My fears about not feeling my feelings were completely unfounded.  I still felt all the same feelings as before, but I could work through them more easily.    

I still worry about things, to be sure. Sometimes, I worry too much. But I've been able to understand my worry more objectively and to do my best to make it productive. 

Worry can become productive if we are willing to remain curious about it even when we are worried.  

If we can remain objective enough to let our curiosity lead us to the root causes of our worry, we soon realize that almost all of the things we are worrying about have little to do with the actual thing itself and more to do with past experiences, trauma, and the like. 

It can also be productive if we let ourselves see more clearly that our worrying about something isn't affect the outcome.  

One of the teachings of Jesus from Matthew's Gospel often comes to mind when I ponder my own worry and anxiety: 

25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life? (Matthew 6:25-34)

Jesus often taught his followers to live more in the present because it was unproductive to dwell on the past and pure speculation to worry about the future.  

This is one of the most difficult things we can do as human beings, much less as followers of Jesus.  Most of us struggle to surrender our outcomes and place ourselves in the hands of a loving God because we worry that things won't work out for us. 

Sometimes, our worst fears are realized.  Sometimes, the things we were worrying about do come to pass, confirming our worries about them.  

But even so, those calamities ought not destroy us.  We are never outside God's grace, forgiveness, and mercy.  We are never so far gone that we can't be found.  There is nothing in this life or the next that can separate us from the love of God.  

May we realize this as one of the truest things we can know.  And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with us all, now and forever. Amen.