A Wall Between Two Gardens

I'm feeling sad today for a lot of different reasons.  It's not a debilitating kind of sad, but it's there, far enough below the surface to not keep me under the covers all day but not far enough that it can't be felt. 

I have discovered in life that sadness is not something I need to run from or try to make better by being distracted, which is easy enough to do.  

Instead, I tend to embrace the sadness, letting it in, so to speak, so that I can feel it and be instructed by it.  I'll let myself listen to sad songs, stay under the covers a little longer on a grey morning, and several other things that allow me to feel the sadness as intensely as I can stand.  

The problem is that sometimes, if I'm not careful, I can become consumed by the sadness and let it take control of my other emotions.  It can bury me if I let it, which is why I need to better understand why I am feeling what I'm feeling. 

Sometimes, it's vital to have some images to draw upon when I'm sorting out how I feel when sadness comes and doesn't seem to want to leave.  

There is this line from a Khalil Gibran poem that I thought of today and decided to share: 

Sadness is but a wall between two gardens. 

The imagery in this line is amazing to me because it perfectly describes how sadness can prevent us from experiencing the good and beautiful things in life if we let it.  Realizing this takes the power away from it.  

Additionally, the imagery describes sadness as a wall that is erected in what could have been a large garden, instead of a divided one. This speaks to how we should view ourselves.  We are not the sadness we feel, we are the garden.  

If we let sadness build a wall, that's what we tend to focus on, not the garden of our soul. 

Maybe you are feeling sad today, and you are beginning to think that you won't be able to shake it.  You should know that first and foremost it's not a terrible thing to be sad.  You are not your feelings, but they can help you understand what's happening in your life if you allow them to do their work.  

You should also know that even though it may feel that sadness has constructed an ugly barrier in the middle of your life, you don't have to let it stay there.  You can tear that wall down at will, if you are willing.  

Sadness should not define us, but it will if we fall into a sense of helplessness and hopelessness about the sadness we feel.  

Some of us have a tendency to want to use our sadness to gain sympathy, or attention, but this is nothing more than a placebo,  a false sense of worth that does little toward being a whole person.  

My firm belief is that God is more concerned with our wholeness than our happiness.  This realization is something we all need when we feel ourselves slipping into the depression or apathy that sadness can bring if we refuse to see it for what it is. 

Wholeness comes when we learn that our emotions and feelings have no control over us that we don't give to them.  We can feel our feelings,and we can also be free to let them go when we've learned from them.  

And this is when happiness is possible.  We choose happiness rather than looking for it outside of ourselves.  It is our wholeness that allows us to choose it over anything else that would build walls in our souls.  

May this be true for all of us.  And may the grace and peace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with us all, now and forever. Amen.