Presby-Musings

Several years ago, I was preaching a Lenten sermon series about letting Jesus undo some of the things in our lives that keep us from being the people we ought to be.  One of those sermons was about forgiveness and reconciliation with the people we were in conflict with or had experienced a falling out with at some point.  As I was preparing that sermon, I became burdened by a conflict I'd had with a colleague years before and how that conflict had led to our estrangement.   I decided at that point that I needed to practice what I was about to preach, so I reached out to him and asked him for forgiveness for anything I had done to contribute to the conflict we'd experienced.  I'd love to tell you that there was a complete restoration of our relationship and that we both asked for and received forgiveness from each other, but it didn't turn out that way exactly.   But I was free from my bitterness about the whole thing and realized how heavy that had bee...

It’s the Fourth Sunday of Lent  Lent is a season of preparation, reflection, and repentance.  It’s also a season when we can learn what it means to discover the holiness of hard things, which is also the title of this sermon series we're working through.  Today, we are going to read some mail from the Apostle Paul.  It is kind of interesting, isn't it, that we are reading someone else's mail when we read all of Paul's letters? And Paul made one of the most essential claims about reconciliation between God and us.     But first, I want to talk about two very important things: Truth and Reconciliation.  Truth & Reconciliation go Hand In Hand.   There can be no reconciliation without truth.   After Apartheid ended in South Africa, the black majority of the country was asked by leaders like Nelson Mandela and Bishop Desmond Tutu to put aside the need for revenge in favor of reconciliation. The Truth and Reconciliation Commissio...

The season of Lent invites us to reflect deeply on our lives and journeys, encouraging a powerful act of letting go that paves the way for renewal and growth: forgiving ourselves.  I came across this poem by Wendell Berry in his "New Collected Works," and it resonated with me powerfully:  “At start of spring I open a trench In the ground. I put into it The winter’s accumulation of paper, Pages I do not want to read Again, useless words, fragments, errors. And I put into it the contents of the outhouse: light of the suns, growth of the ground, Finished with one of their journeys. To the sky, to the wind, then, and to the faithful trees, I confess my sins: that I have not been happy enough, considering my good luck; have listened to too much noise, have been inattentive to wonders, have lusted after praise. And then upon the gathered refuse, of mind and body, I close the trench folding shut again the dark, the deathless earth. Beneath that seal the old escapes into the new.” I ...

One of my greatest obstacles toward becoming the person I know I want to be is me.  I can't seem to get out of my way sometimes. More often than not, I am my own worst enemy, and I have self-destructed more than a few times.   If this sounds strange for a pastor to admit, you should know that what I am describing is pretty much the entire human condition.  If we are all being honest, we know this to be true for all of us.   But our propensity for blowing up our lives without much help doesn't have to be our story. We just need to be honest with ourselves and others about it, spend some time really getting to know ourselves and offer ourselves grace when needed.  I'm learning that Lent is the perfect time to reflect on this.  As we continue our journey through Lent, we must be reminded that this season is traditionally marked by reflection and transformation; we are invited to delve into the depths of our spiritual journey and explore the true powe...

There was a time in my career as a pastor when I was more worried about offending people and ruffling feathers than I was about speaking the truth about what it means to be a Jesus-follower in a divided culture.  Interestingly, when I've taught and preached about love and justice from the Bible, some folks have accused me of being "too political," glossing over the fact that the words I used were directly from Scripture.  Now, I should say that I have sometimes succumbed to the temptation of self-indulgence and have let my own fears, anger, and frustration seep into what I say.   This is why I need Jesus, y'all.  I have to die to myself and offer up repentance for that kind of thing all the time.   However, I've come to believe that it is crucial as a Christian and a pastor to be guided by the teachings of Christ, the witness of Scripture, and my own faithful convictions when I speak to the challenges of our day.   The season of Lent is a per...

One of the spiritual practices I decided to add to my Lenten journey this year was doing something creative each day.  I gave myself the parameters of either composing a poem or creating a piece of art.  I've been composing poems mainly because I've not yet had time to assemble the materials I need to create artwork.  The discipline of writing a poem a day was daunting at first, but I've felt my mind and spirit open up a bit over the past several days, and the ideas have been coming quickly.  The problem is, I've been compelled to write poems about pain, transitions, and other assorted fun topics because I've been experiencing both and more lately.  And, of course, there is the season of Lent itself, which lends itself to that kind of thing.  As rewarding as this practice has been, I wish I could write something more cheerful.   That feeling may resonate with more than a few folks reading this today.  Embracing our brokenness isn't easy, but ...

The other day I read an excellent poem/prayer by theologian Walter Brueggemann on the season of Lent and I felt compelled to share and reflect on it here:  “Loss is indeed our gain” The pushing and the shoving of the world is endless. We are pushed and shoved. And we do our fair share of pushing and shoving in our great anxiety. And in the middle of that you have set down your beloved suffering son who was like a sheep led to slaughter who opened not his mouth. We seem not able, so we ask you to create the spaces in our life where we may ponder his suffering and your summons for us to suffer with him, suspecting that suffering is the only way to come to newness. So we pray for your church in these Lenten days, when we are driven to denial- not to notice the suffering, not to engage it, not to acknowledge it. So be that way of truth among us that we should not deceive ourselves. That we shall see that loss is indeed our gain. We give you thanks for that mystery from which we live. A...

It’s the Third Sunday of Lent  Lent is a season of preparation, reflection, and repentance.  It’s also a season when we can learn what it means to discover the holiness of hard things, which is our Lenten sermon series title.  Today, we will read ancient words from the Hebrew prophet Isaiah and find a vision for a world made right for all of us.  Have you noticed that people seem a little more on edge than usual?  I notice it all over the place.  We're all ready to go from 0 to 60 in less than 6 seconds regarding conflict.   I have been reading that there are more people walking around with varying degrees of depression, anxiety, and unresolved trauma than at any time in US history.   We're all dealing with stuff.  We always have had to deal with stuff, but when the environment around us is charged with negative energy and worry, it's hard not to internalize it.  When you are going through difficult times, dealing with hard thi...

There's no getting around it; Lent is often associated with self-denial and sacrifice. For many Christians, it is a time when we are challenged to "give up" things to fulfill some kind of obligation to God.  One of those time-honored practices is not eating meat on Fridays during Lent, which many of my Catholic friends either participated in when they were young or still do because it is part of the tradition.  In some parts of the country, you can find a fish fry on Fridays during Lent at churches, community organizations, and even restaurants dedicated to helping folks who are observing meatless Fridays as part of their Lenten observance.   I think there is a lot of good that can come from these kinds of observances, and it definitely helps to build community when people gather together to fry up some fish to eat together.   But there's so much more to Lent than giving up things, as I have alluded to throughout the last several Devos.  In fact, one o...

I lived most of my younger life believing that if I could do enough to please God, God would love me.  This misguided belief came from ideas about God that centered on the notion that God pretty much couldn't stand me because I was such a worthless, sinning wretch, and the only way to fix that was to somehow become holy.  But since being holy was incredibly hard, tedious and awful (at least the way I saw it), I decided that the idea of an angry, demanding God was not one that I  wanted to entertain, so I tossed my whole belief system about God out the window.  What I didn't realize at the time, and would take me decades to truly internalize, was that God loved me as I was, and would continue to love me no matter what I thought about God, or how badly I messed up the direction of my life.  In the end, that understanding of God's love drew me back to faith and a deeper understanding of what it meant to believe in a loving, grace-filled God, who would risk everythi...

Sometimes the journey through the Season of Lent can seem long, especially if we are doing our best to live differently as we journey through it.  Perhaps you decided to give something up for Lent, and now as we are not even halfway through, you are beginning to wonder if it will ever end.  Or maybe you added something to your daily routine as a Lenten practice, but you are feeling the pinch on your time and energy.  I get it.  Lent often feels like that for more reasons than our own practices.  We are ending a long winter, and the days are a bit longer, the sun may be coming out a bit more, but we are ready for full-on Spring, and then beyond.   Perhaps vacations await, or the end of the school year.  Maybe you are just ready to plant flowers, and sit outside on your patio without freezing to death.   This is a good opportunity in this series of Lenten devotions to consider Easter for a bit.  The late Orthodox priest and theologian...

I never really imagined that Lent would be a time to reflect on the many divisions within our culture. Still, I read a devotional by Walter Brueggeman, one of my favorite theologians, and thought otherwise.  Perhaps no other theologian alive today is more prepared to speak into the divisions we face as a society.  Throughout his adult life, Brueggeman has studied the Scriptures, specifically the Old Testament prophets.  His words ring like those of old prophets, and they offer us a different perspective on Lent that is needed now more than ever.  Here is his profound vision for this time:  “I imagine Lent for you and for me as a great departure from the greedy, anxious antineighborliness of our economy, a great departure from our exclusionary politics that fears the other, a great departure from self-indulgent consumerism that devours creation. And then an arrival in a new neighborhood, because it is a gift to be simple, it is a gift to be free; it is a gift to ...

One of the many things I struggle with is the practice of self-denial, especially when going through life's many challenges.   For example, some days when things aren't going particularly well,  I just want to eat Taco Bell (like an entire party pack of tacos) and binge watch something on television.  Or I might sleep late instead of rising at my usual time, so I don't pray and journal like I should.  It can even mean putting off chores that I need to complete because I feel overwhelmed by having to do them, and would rather do something more "fun" or "engaging" like shopping or find a concert to attend.  None of these things in and of themselves are terrible (maybe the party pack of tacos), but when I use them to avoid practicing self-denial, they can become the kinds of escapes that I need to avoid if I'm going to be my best self.  I think we all could use a reframing of the whole concept of self-denial, though. A different mindset might give us th...

There was this song in the 90s by the band Garbage entitled "Only Happy When It Rains," and the lyrics went like this:  I'm only happy when it rains I'm only happy when it's complicated And though I know you can't appreciate it I'm only happy when it rains You know I love it when the news is bad Oh why it feels so good to feel so sad I'm only happy when it rains.  It's the kind of song that can get in your head, but the lyrics are problematic.  I don't consider myself a glass-half-empty person, but sometimes I dwell on the negative, and let the darkness in.   And when the darkness gets too much of a toe-hold, I want it to be gone quickly.  So, I'll try to distract myself to take away the pain and discomfort the darkness brings.  I feel like there are a lot of us out there who struggle with this.   It's yet another reason to embrace the lessons we can learn through Lent.   During Lent, we are offered a profound opportunity for reflec...

One of the many disciplines that emerge from having your house up for sale is that it has to be kept clean and devoid of clutter so that if/when it is shown to prospective buyers they don't turn their noses up in disgust.  So over the past several months, I have done just that.  I clean my house regularly, make sure there is not a scrap of clutter, and I also put a lot of air fresheners around the place so that it not only looks clean but smells that way, too.   In the end, I've grown to like this way of living.  I have discovered I don't need a lot of things that I thought I used to need.  I like it when my house is neat, orderly, and pleasant.   The other day, I came across a quote from N.T. Wright, as I was reading devotionals about Lent. It resonated with me, and I wanted to share and reflect on it.  N.T. Wright writes:  "Lent is a time for discipline, for confession, for honesty, not because God is mean or fault-finding or finger-po...

When you are going through tough times, it's easy to let your focus narrow and become focused solely on your own problems, challenges, and trials.   I have my own struggles with this.  I have called this narrowed focus "navel gazing" from time to time, because it speaks to how I often lower my gaze, intent on myself to the extent that I often ignore the needs of the world and others.    I am so grateful for the Season of Lent as a time to break that cycle of self-absorption and lift my head even a little.   As we step into this sacred Season of Lent, we are called to embark on a journey of reflection, sacrifice, and renewal. It is a time to deepen our understanding of virtue and its significance—not just for ourselves, but for the broader community in which we live.  John Chrysostom beautifully captures this sentiment when he states,  “No act of virtue can be great if it is not followed by advantage for others. So, no matter how much time you...

I'm not very good at giving things up for Lent.  I have tried in the past, but it has never ended well.  Once, I tried to give up coffee for Lent, an idea born out of some misguided thought that I should suffer throughout my Lenten journey.  I suffered for three days, and then decided that I'd had enough.  Then I felt guilty for giving in, but even that faded as my headache from a lack of caffeine dissipated and I could once more be around people without wanting to scream at them.   I've learned that if our plan is to suffer during Lent, it's not a great motivator.  So that's why I have added things to my life as a Lenten practice, rather than taking things away.   Interestingly, by adding things to my life, some things naturally fall away, and typically those are things that I was spending too much time on in the first place.   All of this has caused me to reflect on what it means to take up life-giving things for Lent, and how tha...

I've spent most of my life trying to understand God.   As I have grown older and perhaps a little wiser, I have concluded that the more I learn about God, the less I know.   I used to have a lot of certainty regarding my beliefs about God.  God fit neatly into my little belief boxes, and behaved (I thought).  I formed my opinions about how God worked in the world by reading the Bible and not really questioning any of it.  It took a crisis of faith to change all of that for me.  Everything I thought I knew for certain came crashing down.  I realized that God was bigger than any version of God I had formed, and honestly the God I had conjured up resembled me more than anything else.  I began to reflect more and more on the prayer of the 13th century mystic Meister Eckhart, who prayed: "God, ride me of God." Eckhart's goal was to be set free from all of the ways he limited God in word, thought and deed.  The other day I stumbled across...